The funniest factions in 40k, starting at the bottom

We all love 40k for the miniatures and the lore. Fortunately, that lore is complex enough to contain serious, heartbreaking and thought provoking themes. But today, I want to talk about what’s funny about 40k, because, at its heart, 40k is satire. We can’t ignore the funny things about our game.

What makes a 40k faction funny? For me, it comes down to how they contrast with the overly serious setting, the actions of important characters in that faction, and the aesthetic elements of the characters (not restricted to famous characters) in that faction. Additionally, my sense of humor is, of course, at the center of this list. Let’s get started.

  • Asuryani
    • I’ve played Eldar for 10 years. These aliens are stodgy and far too serious. Have you ever read one of the Black Library novels about these freaks? You don’t have to turn too many pages to pick up on their self-important vibe. No one has cracked a joke since the fall, because they’re too afraid that Slaanesh will show up. They’re cowards, and cowards aren’t funny.
  • Salamanders
    • You can’t be a good guy faction and be funny. Ok – so you save people from peril. You focus on avoiding human casualties at all costs in the 40k universe, where human lives are treated like ants at the mercy of a magnifying-glass-wielding bully. Take a note from the Emperor, and sacrifice a few thousand psykers every one in a while.
  • Black Templars
    • They’re so serious that it is funny. Most importantly, they’re petty. Being petty is a cornerstone of doing funny things. Helbrecht leaving Grimaldus to die on Helsreach because he didn’t vibe with him is one of the all-time pettiest moves in the 41st millennium. The nasally voice that he has in the audiobook doesn’t lend gravitas to this move, either. Thank you, High Marshall (and the narrator of Helsreach). 
  • Imperial Guard (Astra Militarum, whatever)
    • The guard are on this list because of the Leman Russ Battle Tank. 40k has demons. 40k has planet-melting laser beams. 40k has psychic forces that enter your mind and force you to kill your compatriots. In the face of it all, we have a WWI era battle tank without a force field, jet engines, or any truly advanced tech. Sure, we can have plasma or melta sponsons, but that doesn’t change why this tank is funny. This metal tank crewed by sweaty humans is at the mercy of difficult terrain that can jam its treads. The Leman Russ is the single greatest miniature (and the most 40k miniature I can think of,) and represents the impossible hilarity of the setting.
  • Orkz
    • Come on, what else could be at the top of this list? They are mushroom who grow into giant green humanoids that use teeth for currency. Their magic system is belief. They substitute “k” and “z” in words like commando and guns, speak like amped up soccer hooligans, and all have funny names. Just like an aborted Super Smash Bros. game, this was no contest.

What factions did I miss on this list? Let me know in the comments, and I’ll take another pass at what the funniest factions in 40k are.

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Conor Lobb

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