The List That’s Going to Win Adepticon!

Zhardsnark crop
Yo dawg we heard you like Orks so we put an Ork on your Orkwith a Grot on him

Yeah, that’s right, like Babe Ruth, I’m pointing at the fences, suckas!

You heard it here first, Orks are gonna win Adepticon…my Orks!

If you have socks on, prepare to have them blown off! My Warboss straight up has a pirate hat on…that’s almost not even fair to my opponents. I may get a judge called on me when people see that.

Pirate Warboss Crop
Shiver me timbers ye stinkin ummies

Just look at him, he’s a little bad ass! But he’s not alone, I have an entire formation of Pirate Mega Nobz to go with him! Holy molly, it’s going to be an Orkpocalpyse up in Chicago!

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Yar we be da stompiest pirates

They even have totally sweet rides to drive around in which will make all the other players so super jelly.

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I almost feel bad bringing the heat like this, kinda unfair. But hey, an Ork’s gotta do what an Ork’s gotta do, ya know what I’m sayin?!

List Name: Da Best List, EVA!!

Detachment 1: Ork CAD

HQ:

Zhardsnark Da Rippa

Warboss: Mega Armor, Da Lucky Stikk

Troops:

Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw

Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw

Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw

Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw

Elites:

Tankbustas x 10

Trukk

Heavy Support:

Lootas x 15

Detachment 2: Da Bullyboyz, Pirate Style!

Mega Nobz x 5

Trukk: Ram

Mega Nobz x 5

Trukk: Ram

Mega Nobz x 5

Trukk: Ram

 

If your eyeballs didn’t melt out of your face from the experience of reading that miracle of list writing, then consider yourself lucky. It is quite simply, majestic.

As you can see, not only are there pirates, but bikers, too! I crapped my pants a little when I wrote that sentence: it contained too much awesome. Who can hope to withstand the combined power of Bikers AND Pirates? Those are forces so powerful, I think they are what really caused the destruction of the Old World.

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So, I have like, no AA, but it’s not like their will be a million Flyrants at Adepticon or anything. Traktor Kannons would be rad, but my Boy Zhardsnark isn’t cool with them in the list, so I’ll just make up for it breaking the wings off of any Flyrant models I see when my opponent isn’t looking. Sorry, bruh!

I’m gonna win by doing it the way grandpa did: punching everything in front of me in the dingus.

So, if you’re unlucky enough to play me at Adepticon you may just want to give up and buy me a beer. I would be cool with that and it would save you from the potentially life ending shame that would come along with playing against a list this glorious.

See you all at Adepticon, WAAAGH!!

author avatar
Reece Robbins President
Co-founder of Frontline Gaming, and creator of the ITC, Reece Robbins has been a pillar of the tabletop community for over two decades. From developing Blood Throne to launching industry-leading hobby products and major events like the LVO, his career is defined by innovation and a lifelong passion for gaming since the 80s. Today, he remains a very active community organizer and business leader dedicated to the growth of the hobby.

51 thoughts on “The List That’s Going to Win Adepticon!”

  1. Oh Reece.. oh silly lil Reece. It’s ok, Frankie and I will win and you can caddy for us after day 1. I will even let you get me water if you are really nice.

  2. If Zhardsnark rams a vehicle with his tank shock, he comes into base to base contact with it. The rules say that if you’re btb with a vehicle you’re engaged with it…
    Nothing like ramming 36″ total in turn 1 for first blood with 4 str 10 attacks!

    1. But after the ram/tank shock, you have to make sure your model is 1″ away still if the unit/model is still there by either moving their unit/model or yours.

      1. Actually the rule for ramming says that you stop in base contact. There are even rules that if you ram a walker with a tank then they can make melee attacks against you, so the same applies to Zahndrekh :)!

        1. I’ve heard both sides. Those who say he can, and those who say he can’t. The rules actually say he can tank shock, “as if he was a vehicle”, but to ram, you have to actualy BE a vehicle…
          Or am I mistaken?

    1. They will usually go with the Megaboss who will tank wounds for them and give them S&P so they can move around and shoot at full BS and with +1WS (Lucky Stikk), they aren’t bad in assault, either!

  3. Archon-Kalafex

    Let me see if I can say this without the earth breaking. You would be unstoppable with pirate biker (ninja!) Orks. But that would probably be immediate disqualification and result in people doing the time warp… again…!!!

  4. I love this list! It is going to take a lot of people by surprise, especially if you have first turn and they are unaware of how fast it is. You actually have a really good AA unit in the Lootas, since that is a potential 45 shots at St.7. Yeah you are hitting on 6’s but that’s slightly worse than what you would normally be hitting on. With that many S7 shots you will at least glance a flier to death each turn or make a Flyrant take a couple armor saves. Of course, you could just keep rolling 1’s for their number of shots, at which time you just keep drinking.

  5. Epic List is Epic. But, I’m really thinking you could’ve taken it up to 12 if you added Kommandos instead of Lootas and made them look like…NINJAS.

    NINJAS! PIRATES! AND BIKERS! Now THAT would be too much awesome to contain and everyone would’ve probably surrendered before you even rolled dice.

  6. So if you get 20-30 people to mimic you and bring this same list to Adepticon, I think it has a chance to win! And certainly the final round will be filled with drunk people talking like pirates.

    You might want to do a brightly colored Heldrake to sit on your shoulder as a Helparrot.

  7. So what are you going to call your army? You know, every tournament-winning army needs a nickname, like #lictorshame.

    How about Pirorks of the Kick-your-beans?

  8. haha best article! Good luck with the tourney.

    Loving the pirate warboss, might have to do something like that for my own, so I can also crap my pants everytime I stare at him.

  9. Is there a reason those Lootas are in the same unit? Why would it be better than 3×5 man units?

    Still, this list is so good and awesome that I feel bad for everyone who plays against it 🙂

  10. Hahaha, Recce you did it. This list looks like ton of fun.

    I have a doubt … how do you select bikers as troops ? Aren´t they Fast troops?

    Thanks and Luck and a bottle of drum !!!

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